So I thought I had it all figured out… until I didn’t.

I had my goals all written up and planned out.

I had my course outline, and some content written, but the more I looked at it, the more I didn’t recognise it.

I was suffering comparisonitis and worrying too much about what other people in the online world were doing.

I was second guessing everything. Every. single. thing. Everything about me, about what I was doing, what I was planning. The self-doubt and negative thoughts were basically screaming at me.

I was virtually crippled by self-doubt and then “old mate” anxiety paid a visit. And I started questioning EVERYTHING!

Who was I to be starting my own business? Who was I to be teaching other people, when I can hardly get this business off the ground? Why would anyone want to listen to what I have to say? Do I even have anything to say? It went on……….. and on…… It was overwhelming to say the least.

Whilst in that mindset, I wasn’t at all productive in doing anything for my business. I pretended to be, but I wasn’t really. I was fooling everyone, including myself.

But, my procrastination (in other words, surfing the socials) turned up something that I found fascinating, which made me want to take a deep dive into learning all about brain science. Which has thankfully lead me to where I am today and the pivot in my business direction.

That one little thing that I stumbled upon that one of many procrastidays was that we have stories in our subconscious, which have been there since childhood and they basically drive us as adults. What The Actual F&%k?

You mean to tell me that shit my parents, teachers, other kids, etc did and said to me as a kid is the reason why I am the world’s biggest procrastinator? Turns out … yep!

My mind was blown and I was hooked on finding out as much about this as I could.

I read books and any online information I could find on the topic. I came across a few very inspiring and educational people who are now mentors to me and I learned a lot.

I made a list of all the little things that happened throughout my childhood. Even all the funny little memories that you don’t think mean much. I then looked at all the limiting beliefs that I have as an adult, all the BS stories that I had been telling myself all these years that held me back and they could all be traced back to one or more events from my childhood.

Coincidentally around the same time I went for a Theta Healing session, which I wasn’t too sure of what to expect and the beautiful lady Karen who did the session told me some things about my childhood that no one else could have possibly known and she actually helped me put together a few more pieces.

So my journey of transformation had begun, but I was still figuring out what to do with this newfound knowledge.

Sitting in the school pick-up zone one afternoon, I was surfing through the socials and I came across a post by a Transformational Life Coach. Hhhmmmm, my first thought was …. ‘What is this you speak of?.

This woman was talking my language. She was talking about things that I was yet to voice in my own transformation. She was speaking about the thousands of people that she coaches, mentors, teaches and inspires. I was struck dumb and cried in the same instant. THIS was the thing that I needed to be doing. I needed to be a Transformational Coach.

Hello Epiphany-Central!

Teaching and inspiring people has always lit me up. I used to love doing all the face-to-face trainings back in my Human Resources days, but I knew I didn’t just want to teach anymore. Been there and done that, also having taught Diploma of Business for a while.

But this! This felt very, very different. This had me tingling. I could more than teach and inspire people. I could actually impact and change lives.

Funny how the universe works, or maybe it was just Mark Zuckerberg recording my thoughts, but an ad popped up for a free one day coaching course for the next week. Naturally, I signed up immediately, thinking that after one day of free training I’d become a coach. Haha. The one day of free training was awesome, but it also opened to my eyes to how much there is behind the scenes to know about coaching. So much brain science. I was hooked and signed up for the intensive 6-day course on the spot, later having to justify the big expense and an interstate trip to my hubby! But I knew it felt right. More right than anything had in a long time.

So, I travelled down to Sydney from my hometown of Brisbane and found myself in a world of very intense learning. This course was jam-packed with information and practical demonstration.

A lovely friend who was away on holidays had so graciously offered her place for me to stay, which was only a quick 10 minute Uber ride from the course. Each night I would return ‘home’ from the course, thoroughly exhausted, exhilarated and excited. I was learning stuff that (a) I never knew existed and (b) fascinated me to no end.

I was in learning heaven. I also made some beautiful new friends from around the country, also in learning heaven.

Each new technique that was taught to us was accompanied by a demonstration on one of the 140 students in the room. On about Day 4 of the course, I was the subject of one such demonstration, and It.Changed.My.Life! Seriously!

It was a technique designed to deal with a past trauma that still haunts and to be able to move past it and not have the after effects of the trauma effect your daily life.

My trauma was my fall eleven years earlier, where I broke both ankles and injured my back falling down some stairs. To that day, I couldn’t walk down a set of stairs without holding a railing and feeling anxiety, with flashes back to that horrible moment in time, when my world made a major pivot.  A pivot that I know led to a series of events that eventually led me to meeting my amazing husband. That lesson has not been lost on me whatsoever.

Our teacher performed this technique on me, having me go through a series of visualisation exercises and after about maybe half an hour, and several mascara stained tissues, I felt relieved. In an instant I could feel the burden had been released. I ran down the two steps off the stage, without a single thought and then at the end of the day, in front of a group of about a dozen loudly cheering women, I ran down a double flight of stairs to the hotel foyer, without an ounce of fear, hesitation or holding onto a railing. I ran (yes, ran!) down a flight of stairs! It felt amazing. The people in the lobby down on ground floor stared, no idea what was going on, with this group cheering on this ecstatic looking woman running down some stairs, but I didn’t care. All I knew is that I felt free.

I felt freer than I had in years.

And by utilising one of the other techniques that I had learned during the course, I was also shifting my chronic back pain that had crippled me since I gave birth to our daughter Sidney 6 years earlier. Being pain and anxiety free even for just a moment was a blessing on it’s own, but this whole course had been worth the several thousand dollars I spent.

After that course, I honestly felt like I could change the world one person at a time. Which is exactly what I am doing now through one on one coaching and my upcoming program ‘Deliberately Transformed’ that I’m about to launch, which teaches you lots of what I learned in my coaching course, so that you (Be Your Own) BYO Coach!

In my next article, I start my mini-series “Stories from our Subconscious”, a collection of stories from myself and people I have met who, whilst working on their mindset and self-development, have discovered the stories that were created in their subconscious many, many years ago, that has held them back throughout their lives.

The first article kicks off with some insight into our subconscious brains and how our human brains are hard-wired. I find this stuff fascinating and I love sharing this knowledge. I hope you do too. Stay tuned…